43. Finding our Friends Again with Shannon George
“I realized I don’t really have friends locally. If I wanted to go to a show and my family couldn’t go, I wouldn’t know who to call.”
We all know that person from high school who seemed infinitely connected — the one everyone knew, everyone liked, and who somehow managed to be everywhere at once. For Tara, that person was her dear friend and former swim-team co-captain, Shannon Douglass (now George).
Tara and Tina invited Shannon to talk about connection as part of this season’s theme, but what unfolded was a conversation about something even more universal — reconnection. Shannon opens up about the ways we can lose touch with friends through family obligations, time constraints, and life transitions, and how hard it can be to rebuild those bonds later in life.
Like so many of us in midlife, Shannon realized, “We’re all looking for our friends again.” Hearing someone so outgoing and social talk about loneliness and rediscovery is both comforting and eye-opening — a reminder that even the most connected among us can feel disconnected at times.
The conversation is both hopeful and deeply encouraging. Shannon shares the small, intentional steps she’s taking to make new connections and rekindle old ones, showing that sometimes all it takes is a simple “yes” to an invitation or an unexpected moment of courage.
Highlights include:
• The trap of thinking “I’m going to have more time” as we get older
• The importance of having local friends separate from family
• The patience and persistence it takes to build lasting friendships
• The many forms of service and how they foster connection
• Shannon’s discovery of Impact 100 and community giving
• Friendship rituals that keep relationships alive
• How easy it can be to reach out — and how hard it can be to actually do it
• The different stages of readiness for reconnecting
• The ways Shannon keeps in touch with her (many!) non-local friends
• The beauty of saying yes to the moment, the person, the invitation
• The power of surprising yourself
Through laughter, honesty, and plenty of real-life wisdom, this conversation reminds us that friendship isn’t about having it all figured out — it’s about continuing to show up and say yes.
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[00:20] Christina Donovan: Welcome to Messy Middlescence.
[00:22] This is a podcast where we talk honestly about the changes, change, challenges, connections, and gifts that come with midlife.
[00:30] Nothing too polished, just real conversations that remind us we're not alone.
[00:36] So let's dive in.
[00:39] Tara: Welcome.
[00:40] This is Tara Conti Bansal, and I am here with Christina Conti Donovan.
[00:46] And I'm so excited to have one of my best friends from high school here with us today on Messy Middlescence.
[00:55] I think of her as Shannon Douglas, although she is now Shannon Douglas. George.
[01:02] Shannon and I were on the swim team together,
[01:06] and we were actually co captains of the swim team together.
[01:10] I think of Shannon as one of the most popular people in our grade.
[01:17] She was homecoming queen and just everybody knew her and loved her. And I think of her as making friends easily.
[01:28] I don't know if that's totally true or not,
[01:31] but we.
[01:32] I thought of her for an excellent person with our theme for this season around friendship and connections and how things have changed.
[01:45] But Shannon is one of those people.
[01:48] I wish I got to talk to her more. I wish she lived down the street. She is still in Pittsburgh,
[01:55] so I don't get to see her as much as I would like. But when we do talk, it's like,
[02:02] even if it's been months,
[02:03] it seems like we're right back where we were when we were in high school.
[02:08] So welcome, Shannon.
[02:11] I'm going to start with the question we always start with, which is what is your story?
[02:17] So how did you get where you are today?
[02:20] And you can go all the way back?
[02:21] Shannon George: Yeah. Okay.
[02:24] I mean, I had a pretty wholesome childhood growing up in the suburbs of Pittsburgh.
[02:31] And I was in the same house the whole time growing up.
[02:38] Four children in our family, two boys and two girls, and I'm the baby.
[02:43] I ended up at Mount Union College, where I got a degree in elementary education and a minor in specific learning disabilities.
[02:52] And Mount Union was a big family school, so three of the four of us ended up going to Mount Union.
[02:57] Tara: Both of your parents go there or just your mom?
[03:01] Shannon George: Both of them.
[03:02] Tara: Okay.
[03:03] Shannon George: Yeah. And both. Both of my grandparents on my mother's side.
[03:08] I don't know if my dad's parents went there. That's actually good question.
[03:13] Anyway,
[03:14] I had been a swimming lesson teacher, right. And I thought, oh, I want to get into teaching. I've had this experience, and I've felt really great about teaching swimming lessons and all of that, but I realized that I really wasn't that excited about teaching,
[03:28] which is what I majored in.
[03:30] I like that. One on one Relationship with people as opposed to a more distant classroom control and all of that stuff.
[03:40] And so that was a little unsettling, kind of realizing that and knowing this isn't really what I want to do long term.
[03:48] But I was fascinated. Oh, yeah.
[03:52] Tara: Did you realize that in college or not till after? Because you did Teach for America, right?
[04:01] Shannon George: I did Teach for America, which sort of stuff seemed like maybe. I mean, I applied to the Peace Corps and Teach for America, and I was going down the path of the Peace Corps.
[04:10] And then along the way, I read something about about a third of the women are raped in the Peace Corps.
[04:17] And I just thought, you know what?
[04:20] That's not really what I'm signing up for. I. I don't know. It just kind of freaked me out. So I got pretty far down that process. And then our mutual high school friend who was at Duke, had had exposure to Teach for America.
[04:37] She's a social. Has a social work background. And so she was kind of like, oh, this might be an interesting program for you.
[04:43] And I was kind of like, yeah, this would be in the States. This would still be service oriented. I'm going to go ahead and see what that's all about. So it seemed to kind of marry my teacher skill set that I already had with kind of this service component that I was interested in.
[05:02] And I had done various service trips both through church and through college. Like, I was going on service trips during my spring break instead to the beach or whatever. Right.
[05:13] So that sounded interesting. But the reality was almost nobody in Teach for America had an education degree. That's not really who they were pulling from.
[05:25] So,
[05:26] I mean, they wanted people that were going to be political leaders, that were going to be mover and shake. Movers and shakers to have this experience within this service world so that their eyes could be opened.
[05:40] You know,
[05:41] in large part, I think it has done that for. In a lot of ways. But anyway, so I was kind of different even than those that ended up in the Teach for America program.
[05:51] I was the third core.
[05:55] And the mantra was for those first few years, like, everybody just be flexible.
[06:01] Like, they didn't know if it was gonna go under.
[06:04] Um, you know, it was. I don't even mean to. This is a little sidebar. But it was so fun to see so many young people.
[06:14] Cause at that time, the founder was only, like, 25 and just working literally around the clock, not sleeping, working toward this vision that they had and.
[06:26] And just being able to be a part of something like that.
[06:29] Even though I would say I Wasn't really that successful at it, but it was still really fun to be part of that experience.
[06:37] Um, I ended up in a special ed classroom, which it was hardcore special ed, as opposed to learning disabilities and support.
[06:47] Tara: In Arkansas, right?
[06:48] Shannon George: In Arkansas. Um, yeah. Actually at the time when Clinton won the presidency.
[06:56] Tara: Yeah.
[06:58] Shannon George: So anyways, after doing Teach for America, decided, okay, I'm not gonna go into teaching,
[07:04] and still had that freedom of youth where it was like, okay, what city do I wanna live in? And got together with another high school friend of ours, and we were like, okay, we're either gonna go to Denver or Atlanta.
[07:18] And she was kind of like, well, I have a bunch of friends in Atlanta. So I was like, okay, let's go to Atlanta.
[07:23] And did some temp work there. Because I had no idea really what I was going to end up doing. And I ended up with a.
[07:34] A fundraising consulting firm. So I learned,
[07:38] you know, which seemed like it would be interesting in terms of working with a variety of nonprofits.
[07:45] But a lot of what I did was work on marketing materials.
[07:50] I don't like being in front of people in a presentation kind of way. And I. The job was kind of starting to move into that, and I was kind of freaking out about it.
[08:01] And at the time when they were like, you know, we. You know, do you want to buy into a partnership? And all this stuff, which was, you know, this went from a temp job to that,
[08:10] I thought.
[08:11] Tara: Which means they loved you.
[08:12] Shannon George: Like, I think they loved me.
[08:15] But also,
[08:17] I was miserable there.
[08:20] But I really liked the one partner. So the one partner was an attorney, the other partner was a minister.
[08:27] And so he worked with all congregations. And then the other guy worked with, like, colleges and universities and. And everybody else.
[08:35] Um,
[08:36] but I knew I wasn't going to be there long term.
[08:39] And at the same time, others in my family were having children, and I was feeling like, I don't know, my nieces and nephews. I want to get home.
[08:46] My friends in Atlanta were all seeming to be getting married or paired up,
[08:51] and I was just going through men unsuccessfully.
[08:55] So decided eventually, you know, I was gonna move back to Pittsburgh.
[09:01] And then in Pittsburgh.
[09:02] Tara: How old were you when you moved back?
[09:05] Shannon George: 28.
[09:06] Tara: Okay. And just to jump back real quick. Cause I feel like you made lifelong friends at Teach for America. Is that true or not true?
[09:19] Shannon George: That's really true. In fact,
[09:22] we just got together, the seven of us, I guess seven women this summer for several days. We hadn't done that in 18 years.
[09:32] And I mean, just like you said, Tara Just like our relationship, it's just. I think for me,
[09:40] there's nothing like being with people who know exactly where you're coming from.
[09:45] You know,
[09:48] just. Just kind of that socially mind, socially minded,
[09:54] just a priority towards helping people, making the world better,
[09:59] being upset about the same things politically being, you know, just.
[10:04] I don't really have that in my neighborhood right now. I don't have that in my community.
[10:10] We're.
[10:12] We're very.
[10:13] Feel like the. The district that I live in is very split down the middle. So there you have to be kind of careful what you say.
[10:21] And I don't know, it just. It just was refreshing. Like, okay, these are my people, you know, like, you can relax and just kind of soak in and. And they are all doing great things.
[10:35] I mean, all. They're all working and. And just have. Many of them have continued in some form or fashion with teaching,
[10:44] whether it's at the college level or starting. One had started her own business,
[10:50] working with autistic kids, you know, then couple of teachers, et cetera. And so they're all still in that field of education in a really meaningful way.
[11:00] And so kind of educating myself because they're living it. And Chris doesn't get too far into politics. That's my husband.
[11:11] So just being able to really learn about,
[11:15] you know,
[11:16] what a variety of people in different states are hearing. And three of the women come from states that are really far to the left,
[11:25] and. And three are states that are really far to the right.
[11:28] So it made for very interesting conversation.
[11:32] And it really made me think about, gosh, if I were living in Texas or Georgia or Kentucky, could I still be able to hang onto these core beliefs in the same way and put myself out there, or does that feel too scary?
[11:52] That's a whole other conversation. Yeah, you know, it's easier to do that if you're living in, you know, Portland, Oregon, or Portland, Maine, or, you know, somewhere where everybody's like, yeah, this is the way we all think.
[12:05] Anyway, go ahead. You were going to say, well, I.
[12:07] Tara: Was just going to ask back to the friendship, like,
[12:11] why? Because it sounds like even though you haven't been with these women in 18 years,
[12:18] it still felt comfortable and fun and like, these are my people.
[12:24] Did you have any theories of, like, why or just because they are your people and you found them.
[12:34] Shannon George: I have kept in touch with almost all of them with some regularity.
[12:40] And through Covid, I put together a group chat.
[12:43] And so we were, you know, following also what was going on with each other throughout many different states in America, which was really fascinating.
[12:53] Um,
[12:54] so we talk once a month through Covid, and that.
[12:57] That kind of reconnected us, but.
[12:59] Tara: And just a chat or did the. Once a month. Was that a zoom?
[13:05] Shannon George: It was a zoom. Although a lot of people turned off the video camera. Yeah, that's fine.
[13:10] Tara: I just wondered.
[13:11] Christina Donovan: Um.
[13:12] Shannon George: Yeah,
[13:14] and I do. I mean, I try to.
[13:18] If.
[13:19] If something reminds me of someone, I try to just say.
[13:23] I try to send a text and be like, hey, this was so funny. Blah.
[13:27] And it. You know, it might be once every six months, but I just try to. And. And oftentimes that spurs a. Hey.
[13:35] Tara: A conversation.
[13:36] Christina Donovan: Right.
[13:36] Shannon George: Like, what are you doing? Or how's it going? Or we should talk sometime or something.
[13:42] Tara: I love that. That's nice. Yeah.
[13:44] Shannon George: Yeah, it's.
[13:46] I. I didn't used to do that. And I think having cell phones and texting and everybody texting, that definitely makes it easier to do that kind of stuff,
[13:56] but just. Also, you don't want to.
[14:00] I think initially I thought, is this invasive? Is this,
[14:03] like. Is this going to be awkward for this person to receive this out of nowhere?
[14:07] You know, it's not awkward. Everybody loves it. That's.
[14:11] That's the message. That's good to know.
[14:13] Tara: And I do feel like, yeah, people, if it's not a good time, they won't respond then. But they still got it. And.
[14:19] Christina Donovan: Yeah.
[14:19] Shannon George: Yeah. And it's like, hey, this person's thinking of me. Like, what's bad? What could be bad about that?
[14:24] Christina Donovan: Yeah, I agree.
[14:26] Tara: All right, so back to your story. You decide to move back to Pittsburgh. You're 28 years old.
[14:35] Shannon George: I transitioned to working at Duquesne University's Nonprofit Leadership Institute.
[14:40] I interviewed for a lot of fundraising consulting jobs, but I really didn't want to do that. And I was kind of like, what am I doing? I. I'm not interested in this.
[14:48] So this was more of a.
[14:51] I was support staff to the woman that really ran this program. But they were. We were training folks who were going to be, you know, young,
[15:00] not young, professionals. Professionals that we're going to be serving on a variety of boards,
[15:04] helping them to know what their role is when they are on a nonprofit board, what they should consider adding to the board.
[15:12] You know,
[15:13] why it might be likely that people brought them onto their board and what, you know, what executive directors might be expecting of them.
[15:23] So that was interesting. It both exposed me to a lot of different people with a lot of different careers and then also a lot of different nonprofit connections.
[15:36] But it became Kind of boring. I mean, I was,
[15:39] I was more than. There was a secretary. I was sort of in between the executive director and the secretary. It was like a program manager or something like that. I knew I didn't want to do that forever,
[15:49] so I started.
[15:51] This one guy who kept speaking for us, happened to work for Mr. Rogers neighborhood's program, which was Family Communications. And he kept saying, shannon, what do you want to do?
[16:02] What do you want to do? Every time you come by, you need to be getting out of here. You know, send me your resume, blah, blah, blah.
[16:07] I just didn't really know,
[16:09] you know, I was kind of like, I'm 20, 28, 29. I sort of thought I'd be married by now. I,
[16:15] you know,
[16:16] I didn't know if I was planning on working when I was having children. So I just, I hadn't really thought in terms of career.
[16:24] So anyway, he kept bringing me different job opportunities and I kept saying, I don't want to do that, Bill. I don't want to do fundraising, so I don't want to do this or that.
[16:32] And then one day he came to me and said,
[16:35] I want you to work for me. And I was like, that, I'll do so.
[16:40] Christina Donovan: Yay.
[16:41] Shannon George: Because I thought, I mean, he was. Talk about magnetic people. He was and is just, gosh, he's just so much fun and knows everybody in the city of Pittsburgh. So well connected.
[16:52] And,
[16:54] um, you know, you can't go out to lunch with him.
[16:57] Like, he's not at the table the entire time you're at lunch. Everybody is just walking over to talk to him. It's like, okay, I thought this was gonna be really nice, but no.
[17:09] So, I mean, just really an infectious person.
[17:12] And he was developing a program called get the Gist, which just stood for Girls in Science of Technology.
[17:20] And he needed somebody to run sort of a marketing campaign for that.
[17:24] And I met with all these different local leaders.
[17:30] It was,
[17:31] you know, people that,
[17:33] within the realm of,
[17:36] you know, big players, I guess, in the nonprofit world who would tell their stories, a lot of women, about how there was a,
[17:45] a struggle with this. And this is an age old problem that girls get out of the science and technology related fields, et cetera, and what they have done in the past in Pittsburgh.
[17:55] Anyway, so I was just collecting all this information and in the end I decided they really didn't need me. That this,
[18:05] this really wasn't what they, you know, the direction they should be going is hiring somebody to do this. They already had everything in place.
[18:13] They just needed to basically hire a real marketing firm and just start putting the messages out there.
[18:21] So after five or six months, I recommended myself out of the job.
[18:26] And,
[18:29] you know, Bill really wanted to find another place for me, but it. It just. It just didn't really make sense at that point.
[18:40] So then at that point, I was involved in a program called Leadership Pittsburgh, and it was like the underling program called Leadership Development Initiative.
[18:49] There are these leadership programs in many cities across the United States,
[18:53] and I don't know if they all do the underling, but it was basically,
[18:59] I think you had to be 26 and under,
[19:02] and it offered all kinds of introductions to various sectors throughout Pittsburgh. So the public sector, the private sector, sort of this. There's kind of the re. The. The religious piece, the,
[19:19] you know, the nonprofit sector, the.
[19:21] You name it. And they tried to get a certain number of.
[19:26] I was going to say students, young. Young professionals that were from all of these different areas.
[19:32] I don't even really know.
[19:34] I'm sure it was Bill that probably got me into that program,
[19:37] but I have a couple lifelong friends from that program, one who I'm having lunch with today.
[19:43] And so that. That was a success in terms of that.
[19:51] But anyway, through that program, there was a guy who owned a product development firm,
[19:58] and he said, hey, we're looking for somebody to kind of be a support person for us.
[20:04] They had all industrial designers and a couple of mechanical engineers working for them. And I was like, okay, have never thought about working in the, you know,
[20:14] not nonprofit sector, but I'm going to give this a shot.
[20:18] And I actually, really, really enjoyed it.
[20:21] So it was kind of their HR department.
[20:23] I was, you know, was a small company, 10 or 20 people, and they didn't have time to be holding my hand through everything.
[20:33] So the. The two partners at the time, that is. And so I learned a ton.
[20:40] And I operated autonomously a lot.
[20:44] And it just. It was. It was really good. It got me out of my comfort zone. I realized I.
[20:52] I maybe don't need to be changing the world, that what I really enjoy is supporting people and looking at that as a more positive thing than not.
[21:04] I think there was a time when I always. My brother and I always thought, we're going to start a nonprofit together. We're going to have all these grants, you know, get.
[21:11] We're going to fundraise, we're going to do. And it was just, you know what? Maybe that's not what I'm going to do, because this is kind of what I'm enjoying.
[21:18] It's odd. But this is, you know, I like.
[21:21] I like paying the bills. I like feeling like, oh, this is taken care of. I like not taking the work home with me.
[21:29] And so I really enjoyed that. And I did that for several years until I got married and started having children.
[21:39] And I went from full time to part time when I had my oldest, and then I quit when I had my second child.
[21:49] Christina Donovan: How did you meet your husband?
[21:52] Shannon George: At an anti Valentine's Day party.
[21:55] Tara: That's a good. That's very funny. I didn't know that.
[22:02] Shannon George: Oh, gosh, you must have known that. Well, this Teach for America group was going. Their. Their.
[22:08] One of the things they had us do is you could get discount tickets to the symphony. It was like eight bucks or something like this. And they had these little young, professional, kind of short symphony things.
[22:20] Can't remember what they were called. But so a group of us went to that. And after that, there was this big party at one of their houses.
[22:27] It was an anti Valentine's Day party. And it was just.
[22:30] It was like a big fraternity party. And I'm not really into that. And so I was kind of like, yeah, I'm gonna go home.
[22:39] And it was Karen Pillar's house,
[22:45] another high school friend.
[22:47] And anyways, they talked me into staying and the rest is history.
[22:55] I met Chris and.
[22:57] And had no interest in him until a few dates later. But,
[23:01] yes, he took his Superman glasses off and there was,
[23:05] you know, like, Clark Kent turned into Superman.
[23:11] Christina Donovan: That's a funny story. Yeah.
[23:14] Tara: You guys have been married how many years now?
[23:20] Shannon George: It'll be 25 this summer.
[23:22] Tara: Oh, that's a biggie.
[23:23] Shannon George: Yeah, biggie. Yeah. So hoping to do something for that, but I'm not sure what that would look like.
[23:30] Tara: And you have three kids, give just a. You know, their ages now and.
[23:36] Shannon George: Sure. My oldest, Duncan, graduated from Elon University and he is supposed to be starting at deloitte advisory in D.C. in February,
[23:50] which, who knows if that will happen given what's going on with the government. He's. He was supposed to start this fall and their whole group got bumped to February. So in the meantime, he's working at a wealth management firm and he's waiting tables at the local country club.
[24:07] And then Lincoln is 19 and he is getting his associate's degree in IT.
[24:14] He's working part time at a local IT firm as well as Topgolf.
[24:22] And Violet is just doing all things. She's 15,
[24:29] so a sophomore in high school.
[24:31] She's doing,
[24:33] you name it, she's doing it from the sports to the theater arts, to the band and choir, to all kinds of different clubs and yeah, we're having a little breakdown right now.
[24:50] Being over sounds kind of like how you were though.
[24:53] Tara: I feel like you did everything because you sang, you did the music, swam.
[24:57] Shannon George: You, you know,
[24:59] play basketball and volleyball. Yeah, yeah, it's in the choir and that's student council and all that stuff. Yeah, she is, she is a mini me.
[25:09] Although I would say she either there's more opportunities or she is just more mature in terms of.
[25:20] I think her heart is a little more social, cause driven.
[25:29] And that's the only thing that frustrates me with,
[25:32] you know,
[25:34] if you're doing all these other things, it's hard to really dig into whether it's mission work of some sort or whether it might be in getting involved with a fundraiser through the school or just volunteering for the homeless or whatever.
[25:53] There's limited time to do that type of stuff and I think that's meaningful to her.
[26:00] Tara: Yeah.
[26:01] Shannon George: The only other thing I would say that I would like people to know about me is that my favorite color is purple.
[26:08] Tara: And anyone who knows Shannon knows that. And I'm actually surprised you're not wearing purple at the moment.
[26:12] Shannon George: I know. I was just thinking that as I.
[26:14] Tara: Said it because you, I feel like, wear purple a lot.
[26:18] Christina Donovan: Is that partly why you named your daughter Violet?
[26:21] Shannon George: Well,
[26:22] you know, it's funny. We liked that name.
[26:26] So the other kids are Duncan and Lincoln and I kind of wanted to go with Vivian to have the whole N thing going on.
[26:34] Chris said that was an old lady name,
[26:36] so we couldn't do that.
[26:38] And I, I did like Violet,
[26:41] but I was a little bit worried that people would think that was weird to people that knew me.
[26:46] Christina Donovan: Oh, because you love purple or.
[26:48] Shannon George: Yes, like it's a thing.
[26:50] And, and so,
[26:53] so we were in the hospital room and we were at that point between Valerie and Violet and Chris looked at me and said, I think she's a Violet. And I was like, okay, that sounds great.
[27:05] I was happy about that. So.
[27:08] Yeah.
[27:10] Tara: And how would you describe your life now? Like you've, you know, you have. You're not empty nested yet. You still have a high schooler and.
[27:26] Shannon George: Yeah, no, this is a good question.
[27:29] So my mother and my father in law live in the area and there is.
[27:41] Well, I'll say that my father died about a year and a half ago,
[27:48] so probably for the last three years there had been some intense caregiving going on.
[27:55] And now it doesn't look.
[27:59] It's not as intense in that,
[28:02] in the way that it was for a period of time.
[28:06] It's more like, okay, once a week I'm hanging out with my mom or,
[28:10] and, and I'm calling her several times a week. And if my sister's not around,
[28:16] like for instance, she and her husband are, they live in the area and they're gone for a couple of weeks. So if she's not here, then I'm over there two or three times.
[28:26] I'm trying to find, you know,
[28:28] availability to get over there.
[28:30] I thought I would be doing more of that with my father in law,
[28:34] but.
[28:35] And my mother in law also died in the last year, actually right about this time last year.
[28:43] But I just,
[28:45] I haven't been able to make it happen.
[28:50] So that's something I need to kind of continue to,
[28:54] to work in day to day.
[29:00] Tara: What did intense caregiving look like before?
[29:09] Shannon George: I guess everything from lots of daily emotional support,
[29:17] hours of,
[29:18] you know, writing notes, communicating with the various siblings,
[29:24] trying to let people know what was going on, what was important to know when, particularly after my father moved from their apartment into basically nursing facility within the same community.
[29:41] You know, my mom was going down to visit him twice a day every day for a long time. And so trying to find ways to both visit her,
[29:51] to spend time with her and him.
[29:55] I, I, I do all the financial stuff for them. So there's always, you know, every time I'm over there, stuff comes up with that there,
[30:05] you know, I was over there yesterday for about six hours and it's email questions and what does this, you know, what does this mean? Is this safe? Is this,
[30:21] I don't know, I just, it, it's hard to,
[30:25] it's hard to explain all the details. Like with my dad, I was taking him to the bathroom, but he was in this nursing, nursing community. But there were very real physical things that you know, I started to be involved with too.
[30:38] Like,
[30:39] okay, he's not supposed to be getting up by himself, but he is getting up. He's you know, a 230 pound man or what.
[30:46] Like I cannot stop him. So I'm going into the bathroom with him, I'm going to help him, you know, undress and take care of that stuff and toilet him and all of that.
[30:57] And there's just, there is an emotional toll when you see these people that are of such strength in your life and offering direction for so many years start to fail.
[31:15] Tara: And need help.
[31:15] Shannon George: And need help. Yeah, I mean physically fail is what I mean.
[31:23] His memory started going at the end too, which was Hard just trying to think of things that you can take over to, to talk, to have whatever meaningful conversation it is to.
[31:38] I know my mom.
[31:40] Anyway, you guys have had a whole, whole podcast about caring for people and you know, it's all of that kind of stuff like your brother in law talked a lot about.
[31:51] Right.
[31:55] It's just, it,
[31:59] it's all the doctor's appointments,
[32:02] negotiating.
[32:05] Okay.
[32:06] Care,
[32:07] getting a wheelchair here or there, ordering equipment,
[32:11] you know, when he, they were still in the apartment, making sure they had what they needed at that point.
[32:18] Yeah. Just,
[32:19] it just never ends.
[32:21] Tara: And you and your sister kind of took that primary role.
[32:28] Shannon George: And my brother in law, I mean, he was a godsend.
[32:32] Tara: Okay.
[32:33] Shannon George: And like, and at this stage my mother has us kind of in pockets.
[32:38] You know,
[32:39] I do like my sister will order clothes for her. She will,
[32:48] she will do kind of lighter day to day fare. And then some of the more,
[32:54] the more serious,
[32:56] I guess some of the doctoring things we share, depending on what that is. But the,
[33:05] you know, like I'm the, maybe I'm the eye doctor person, she's the ear doctor person or she, you know, whatever, however it is, my mom has it arranged in her mind.
[33:13] And then as I said, I'm doing a lot of the financial stuff at this stage.
[33:20] And I, and my father was smart. He engaged me in that many years before he was really going downhill. Yeah, I remember that.
[33:31] Tara: Before they even went into the community.
[33:34] Shannon George: Right.
[33:34] Tara: Involved in that.
[33:35] Christina Donovan: Yeah.
[33:35] Shannon George: And at that time, you know, he was paying me to do that and felt like, you know, your mother is not just, she's not going to be really just wanting to know about all this stuff.
[33:47] So.
[33:49] You know, my mom's smart and she could, she could learn it,
[33:52] but it just was great foresight on his part because there are some things that it's just too complicated for her at this stage to understand what, what's what. And so it's good to have like a resource that I can explain it to her, help her to understand and then.
[34:13] Yeah. Instead of her having to figure it out, that would definitely put her over the edge.
[34:18] Christina Donovan: Yeah.
[34:18] Tara: And how old's your mom now?
[34:20] Shannon George: 92, but yeah.
[34:22] Tara: Wow.
[34:22] Christina Donovan: I had no idea. Your mother, that, that's impressive.
[34:25] Shannon George: Um, yeah.
[34:28] Tara: And she's still with it and she's still moving around.
[34:31] Shannon George: I mean,
[34:33] she is, I mean she, she doesn't drive anymore, but she does, she lives independently within a, a retirement community.
[34:40] She's had a big struggle with the whole friend thing.
[34:44] You know, at 92, your friends just keep dying on You?
[34:47] Christina Donovan: Yeah.
[34:47] Shannon George: Yeah.
[34:49] And so there's emotional resistance from,
[34:54] you know, I know I need to be connected to people, but how close do I really want to be to people that feel like they're not going to be around?
[35:01] Christina Donovan: There's a natural tendency to hold back because you don't know how long you might have with that person or. Yeah, it's kind of protecting yourself. I can totally see that.
[35:14] Shannon George: Yeah.
[35:16] Tara: I'm curious. Did your mom volunteer voluntarily choose not to drive anymore, or was there a conversation that had to happen?
[35:30] Shannon George: She really.
[35:31] She kind of volunteered.
[35:33] She. She basically.
[35:36] She brought her car when they moved to the community.
[35:40] She drove a little bit,
[35:44] but she kind of.
[35:46] She probably let the car sit for nine months or more and just kind of waited to see do I need it or don't I need it?
[35:57] And I think eventually figured out, you know, I really don't need the car.
[36:01] And at that point, she passed it on to one of my kids, who in turn totaled it.
[36:08] Tara: But. And what about with your dad and driving? Did he choose? I just feel like this is a common struggle.
[36:19] Christina Donovan: Yeah.
[36:19] Tara: So that's what I'm. I wanted to ask.
[36:23] Shannon George: That was.
[36:24] We encouraged that more,
[36:27] I would say.
[36:31] I think.
[36:33] I think he eventually did get to a point where he.
[36:37] I mean, he still had my mom driving,
[36:40] but he. He realized he really wasn't leaving the house for anything for the most part. And so other than having somebody take him out to get things for the garden or Duncan, you know, my oldest was helping them plant things for a number of years, and.
[37:00] Tara: It.
[37:01] Shannon George: Going out to dinner. My mother could drive, or.
[37:04] So it wasn't as painful as it is for some people, I'll say that.
[37:09] But there. There was a period of time where it was kind of like, please stop driving.
[37:14] And I think my brother in Chicago would come home and his.
[37:18] His wife was like, I'm not riding with him anymore. Like, we're just.
[37:23] And so that was a good outsider's perspective,
[37:28] even for my dad,
[37:30] for that to be reflected to my dad, like,
[37:33] you're really not safe.
[37:35] Yeah.
[37:36] Yeah.
[37:40] Christina Donovan: I mean, it sounds as though service has been a big part of your life. Are there. Do you continue to do a lot of service now?
[37:51] Shannon George: Not really.
[37:52] I. I did join a community choir,
[37:56] and part of their philosophy is to reach out into the community, to sing at different community events, to sing at retirement communities and things like that.
[38:08] So there is that piece.
[38:10] I.
[38:11] I'm not sure this is exactly service, but I'm trying to do better at volunteering for various things for,
[38:19] like,
[38:19] in Violet's school.
[38:22] That's service. Yeah, that's the.
[38:24] Any.
[38:25] Christina Donovan: Anything that hesitation is service, as far as I'm concerned.
[38:30] Shannon George: But I also.
[38:31] Tara: I feel like what you're doing to help or have done to help take care of your parents, that service, I mean, there's.
[38:41] Shannon George: I. I would say that. And, you know, things have come up to get sort of into the friend thing.
[38:48] One of the things I really enjoy is if somebody has an issue that might be tangentially connected to me or whatever,
[38:57] and somehow or another,
[39:00] I.
[39:01] I learn of this story, and I think I know how I can help this person.
[39:06] So rather than being involved with a nonprofit, a perfect example is another high school friend, Alexi,
[39:13] whose daughter had a very serious, unusual condition that I just happened to have another one of my best friend's children that had it right.
[39:24] And I think There was a GoFundMe page for this woman's daughter.
[39:30] She was living in Australia,
[39:32] still does.
[39:33] And I thought, oh, my gosh, I know exactly what this is, and I know how to help her.
[39:39] And,
[39:40] you know, for several weeks I was doing all this research and getting into, like, I just get off on that stuff.
[39:48] And her daughter ended up coming to the States and getting this treatment and, you know, is better.
[39:57] So just.
[40:00] There have been little glimmers like that of.
[40:04] Tara: Helping where you can.
[40:05] Shannon George: Helping an individual, I guess I would say yeah. And I don't know if you want to get into all the friendship stuff in an organized way or not, but I am.
[40:19] I am trying and have been trying for the last several years to find ways to make friends,
[40:25] because I really feel like I have almost no friends locally. Like, if I were going to.
[40:35] If I wanted to go to a show and Violet or Chris couldn't go,
[40:40] I'd be hard pressed to think of anybody that I could go with,
[40:43] you know, like, okay, who do I call?
[40:47] And that,
[40:49] contrary to. To Tara's lovely introduction, which is how I see myself,
[40:55] you know, that's just not where I'm at.
[40:58] And so I was reflecting on this and how I got to this point.
[41:06] And I do think it's. It's been a combination of having,
[41:15] well, I don't live anywhere where any of my high school friends live. I don't live anywhere where my really one college friend lives that I'm really in close touch with or any of these Teach for America people.
[41:28] So it. There wasn't that launching off point locally. I just have family and I don't have, you know, for the. For.
[41:39] I really don't. I don't have a job,
[41:42] and I haven't had a job in many, many years. So when I did have a job at Family Communications, I worked on my own.
[41:54] Christina Donovan: Right. You said you were very autonomous. And I do think too, I mean, when you are doing the type of caregiving that you spent a large part of your time doing, that's very isolating and it's very time consuming.
[42:11] You know, it's both of those things which can really hinder, I think, connection to people outside life.
[42:19] Shannon George: I wasn't an uber exerciser at this stage of life, which some people were, some people weren't, but there was definitely some of that, like, we go to the same gym or not, or I.
[42:33] And I wasn't working.
[42:36] So it was kind of. There wasn't.
[42:38] I didn't have that ability to. You know what that's like, Tina,
[42:44] you just don't feel very like you have a whole lot to offer or maybe a lot to contribute to the conversation.
[42:52] So I just wasn't finding my people along the way.
[42:56] And then, as you said, Tara, I got more involved with my family, which,
[43:00] fortunately, I love my family. I love spending time with my mother and my father, challenging as he was in his last couple years, was just,
[43:12] you know, it was hard, but it was. It was so meaningful.
[43:17] Christina Donovan: Yeah.
[43:17] Tara: Like on a relationship level that was really deep and made a difference.
[43:24] Shannon George: Right.
[43:27] So all of a sudden, you know, every year, I just kept thinking, I'm going to have more time this year. I'm going to have more time this year. And something would come up because my kids are older.
[43:35] Right. So I should have more time.
[43:38] And this is the first year where I've thought, okay, all of a sudden I've got a lot of time. I mean, Violet's gone from like 6 in the morning till 8 or 9 at night,
[43:49] many nights of the week.
[43:51] And everybody is kind of operating in their own little universe around me now. The complicating thing now is I have to share a car because we have three cars.
[44:06] So initially, that was really hard. I mean, I was just stuck at home alone again because everybody had all had jobs they were going to, and.
[44:17] But interestingly,
[44:21] because I was given the questions ahead of time, I was kind of thinking through, okay,
[44:27] who are my different friends now?
[44:30] Where do they come from? What are the pockets? How long does it take to form a real friendship and all of that stuff?
[44:36] And I joined this community choir that I was talking about, and I also sing in the church choir,
[44:43] but I joined this community choir about four years ago and thought I just don't know if I am ever going to connect with any of these people. But I'm not giving up yet.
[44:53] Maybe I'll eventually serve on the board or do something like that.
[44:57] And the only time you really get to talk with people when you're engaged in an activity like this is in your five minute breaks during your dress rehearsals, you know, before and after or a 15 minute break.
[45:12] There maybe there's an outing once a semester where everybody goes out after a concert or something.
[45:21] There really just isn't a lot of time to make meaningful connection.
[45:25] But along the way, you, you, you do start to get these little nuggets about people and it just takes a long time.
[45:34] So this is, this is one of the things that has been exciting this week,
[45:41] which is really timely.
[45:44] You know, I had, I had reached out to one of the women in this corral and said,
[45:49] somebody who, I thought, this is a cool woman. I'd really like to get to know her.
[45:53] And it was right before she was leaving for two weeks.
[45:55] And I was like, huh, that's a bummer.
[45:59] Just going on vacation with her husband or whatever.
[46:01] And then I'm sitting in corral and the woman next to me is telling me that she's lonely. Basically.
[46:10] Her kids don't live around here. She's in her 70s,
[46:13] she's really cool, bright.
[46:18] And I was, I was like, me, your phone number?
[46:21] Christina Donovan: Yeah.
[46:22] Shannon George: And she was so excited to do that. And,
[46:25] and I was like,
[46:27] this was so easy, you know, why am I, have I not been doing this kind of thing?
[46:31] And there's another woman who had come to one of Violet's shows from the corral and she walked me out from the rehearsal and just said, hey, I was thinking of you.
[46:44] I'm starting this nonprofit and I really think that you would be a great person to plug in. It's just once a week, blah, blah, blah.
[46:51] And I just started feeling like, okay, it's starting to happen,
[46:56] like things are starting to click.
[47:00] And then I got this random call from this woman who I was saying, I'm going to lunch with today, who Chris actually taught her children.
[47:10] But other than that, we really,
[47:13] like. I went to the hospital when she had a child and I really have hardly seen her since then.
[47:21] Tara: To make the. That shows to me you don't go to the hospital for just anybody.
[47:26] Shannon George: Right, right.
[47:27] Christina Donovan: I don't.
[47:28] Shannon George: Yeah.
[47:29] And that's what I'm saying. Like, we were pretty, pretty close for a period of time.
[47:34] And she's a rabbi and.
[47:41] But I don't Think she's. I'm gonna find out, but I don't think she's doing her rabbi thing right now anymore.
[47:49] But just recognizing, okay, we're all kind of getting to this stage of life, like, getting.
[47:54] We. We did this Teach for America trip this summer, reconnecting with those women.
[47:59] Like, we're. Everybody's kind of getting to this point where we're looking for our friends again.
[48:06] And there's a really cool woman, that woman that I sing in the choir with at church, who I also had lunch with, who is just somebody I have a huge amount of respect for.
[48:22] And she said, hey, we do this thing where we pool money.
[48:28] There's about 150 people, I think. And of course, she's like the executive director of it or whatever, because she's. She is always that person.
[48:38] Everybody contributes $500 into this pool. I can't remember how she referred to it, but it's a 501C3.
[48:45] And then they.
[48:47] They decide,
[48:48] yeah, they give all the money out.
[48:50] Tara: I think most cities have this.
[48:52] Christina Donovan: I've never heard of this.
[48:54] Tara: It's. I'm used to hearing it as, like, the impact 100.
[48:58] And I think a lot of them are like a hundred women.
[49:03] And then they. They collect this money, everybody. And then they choose. Right. Who to give it to.
[49:09] Christina Donovan: Shan.
[49:09] Tara: Is that correct?
[49:10] Shannon George: Yeah, they have a theme, and I think there's. Their focus, I guess I should say is childhood hunger. I think she said, oh, wow.
[49:20] So that's who they're targeting. And then people submit grant proposals and stuff like that to them, and. And they evaluate where they want the money to go. But she was just saying, I think it would be great for you to get involved in this once, you know, once Violet's out of school and you can.
[49:37] So there are all these little things that are percolating for me that make me feel like, okay, I'm not just going to be sitting at home watching Gilmore Girls or whatever, you know, when I'm retired.
[49:51] Like, there's.
[49:51] Christina Donovan: There are two. What happens is you get some things that percolate, and then those things lead to other things. I just know, like, it's sort of. The more people you get connected to, the more connections you seem to have, it sort of self perpetuates.
[50:10] So I'm guessing that will probably happen to you,
[50:12] you know,
[50:14] through the things you're doing, you'll end up meeting all these other people.
[50:19] Tara: Yeah.
[50:19] Christina Donovan: Or you'll have more opportunities that present themselves as a result, you know?
[50:24] Shannon George: Right.
[50:25] Yeah. We actually. Lincoln and I volunteered for a computer organization that repurposes computers for elderly folks.
[50:36] And just like you said,
[50:39] a byproduct of that that I was not expecting was meeting probably six or seven other people there that are really involved in communities or pockets of communities that I think are really cool within Pittsburgh that I just feel starved for.
[50:56] And I never would have thought that would have happened from this little experience.
[51:01] So,
[51:03] yeah, I'm excited for just exactly what you're saying, Tina. I think that's. That's true, that eventually it's not just going to be going online and saying, what am I interested in volunteering in?
[51:15] I'm hoping that it will be. I want to work with these people on a project they're passionate about, see if I'm passionate about it, too,
[51:22] and then move forward and find out, are there other things that I really want to get involved with along those lines or different lines, but tangentially related? I guess,
[51:34] yeah.
[51:35] Tara: There's a part of me, like, I'm trying to think how to phrase this, but, Shannon, I do think of you as someone who is very outgoing and very.
[51:49] I don't know, like I said, makes friends easily.
[51:52] And so there's a part of me that's, like, a little bit in shock that it has been so difficult for you, and it's looking at that.
[52:03] Um,
[52:05] and then a little bit for those of us who aren't like you, like, oh, my goodness, like, how much harder.
[52:13] Like, in some ways it makes you feel better, but in some ways it's like.
[52:18] Feels worse because I.
[52:22] I just.
[52:22] Shannon George: Yeah.
[52:23] Tara: I just think of you as someone who makes friends wherever you go, and.
[52:28] Shannon George: But I don't go anywhere.
[52:30] And I think that's part of it. That. That's a big part of it. Like, when you knew me best in high school.
[52:36] Right. I was just. I was in so many different pockets of people,
[52:41] but within a structure.
[52:43] So there was a reason to work with people. There was. There was opportunity to get to know people.
[52:48] And I think that's what.
[52:50] That's what I'm figuring out. It's not just like, hey, let's go to the show and make friends.
[52:55] It's kind of like, no, let's.
[52:57] Let's do something we're both interested in and then find the people that are interested in that. And. And it seems so obvious,
[53:06] but I don't know it.
[53:10] Tara: But to your point, like, for the past many. I mean, probably 15 years, you've been focused on your family and parents.
[53:22] Christina Donovan: Yeah.
[53:24] Tara: That has taken, if not all of your bandwidth. The Majority of your bandwidth.
[53:31] Shannon George: It's true. And I would say that, Tina, you probably know this too. Like when you're not working and you're available all the time. Your children know that.
[53:42] Christina Donovan: Yes. Right.
[53:44] Shannon George: And they. I mean, they are in constant contact.
[53:46] And you know, Lincoln, if he's between classes and he's bored, he's calling me.
[53:54] And I still want to be able to be that.
[53:57] You know, I. I still enjoy that.
[53:59] Tara: Still feels precious and. Yeah.
[54:02] Christina Donovan: Important. Yeah. Because that's not going to be there forever, you know.
[54:07] Shannon George: Right.
[54:07] Yep. I'll be replaced. I know that.
[54:10] So it's that balance of.
[54:13] Okay. I need to be making my own way here and making sure that I have someplace to go when that drops off.
[54:22] Christina Donovan: Yes.
[54:25] Shannon George: Wow.
[54:26] Tara: We're. Time has flown. I can't believe we're.
[54:29] Christina Donovan: I know. It has been so fascinating listening to you, Shannon. I can't believe we're out of time.
[54:35] Tara: I know.
[54:36] Shannon George: Oh, my gosh. I can't even.
[54:38] Tara: What question do you wish we had asked? Or what would you like to share? And maybe we'll have to have you come back because I feel like.
[54:50] Christina Donovan: Thinking that you might be a two parter.
[54:54] Tara: If you're willing.
[54:57] Shannon George: Oh, that's so funny.
[55:04] I guess I would just.
[55:06] I would say when you are with a community of people,
[55:13] this is what I started synthesizing and thought, okay, what are the way. Ways that I've made little connections and it's okay. I sing in this choir.
[55:22] Somebody in the choir sings in the Pittsburgh Opera.
[55:25] She's putting out there discount tickets to the opera.
[55:29] So go, Shannon.
[55:31] Find somebody and go.
[55:32] Like you're not only supporting this person, but it's an excuse to invite somebody else to go.
[55:39] Tara: And it's an interest of yours and it's.
[55:41] Shannon George: I mean, you know, I'm not a huge opera person or anything, but I could do it once a decade.
[55:48] Christina Donovan: I guess that's the thing. I have a friend that she has a friend that all they do is they go to the theater like they have a subscription and they see a show.
[55:56] Like every time there's a show, they get tickets and they go. And that's the primary basis of their friendship. But they have dinner, they go to the show, like it's their thing and it's something they both depend on and look forward to.
[56:10] And I mean,
[56:13] when you talked about.
[56:14] Tara: Even at the beginning, where if Violet or Chris couldn't go to a show, there was a part of me that's like.
[56:21] I mean,
[56:22] I consider myself your friend, but if I live near you, I Still probably wouldn't really want to go to the show because that's not my thing.
[56:31] Shannon George: Right, Right. That's right.
[56:34] Tara: So, I don't know. I was just wondering. It's like, when you said that, my reaction was maybe the friends you have just aren't into shows.
[56:42] Shannon George: But,
[56:44] I mean, they're.
[56:46] I think they would humor me if they're. Even if they're not totally into. But the. Some of the. Some of the women that I have connected with a little bit for a variety of reasons are really busy right now and have been busy either through divorce or through,
[57:06] you know, second career.
[57:08] Yeah, yeah.
[57:11] But just also,
[57:14] if you're in a group and somebody's sick, or if you're in a group and something, you know, like, bring a meal, go visit this person, do, like, go out of your comfort zone, even though you never have spent time alone with the person, and go do that.
[57:28] Go do that thing that makes that relationship a little more solidified and lets them know, I see you,
[57:36] and I want to be a part of your life in some. Some way. Maybe small, maybe large. But this is going to give me a chance to get to know you a little bit better, to help determine that, too.
[57:50] I think the fact that some people have come out to support Violet in a variety of different ways. She does sing in the choir with me at our church,
[58:01] so. And it's all adults and Violet,
[58:05] so that's been fun to have some people come see her. And so that's how they re. Have reflected that back to me. I'm like, yeah, I need to be doing that and going to whatever thing that they're involved with, or they need me to read to students, or they need me to help out with the.
[58:22] Some other choir or whatever. Like, you know, I want to be able to.
[58:26] To be available for that, as my kids don't need me.
[58:31] Yeah.
[58:33] Tara: What are you most proud of?
[58:38] Shannon George: Okay, well, other than the obvious, which is, you know, the. The happiness of your family, the feeling like you. Your family is stable, that really. That. That Lincoln has become the person that he has.
[58:54] Has.
[58:55] It's. It's really heartwarming and.
[59:00] Tara: But that I feel like, is huge enough. Like, to me, I don't know, it is.
[59:05] Shannon George: But let me tell you something that is going to surprise you, which is in high school,
[59:11] when I swam at Whitby's,
[59:16] the 50 free, I get the best time of my life.
[59:20] That was one of the greatest moments of my life and remains one of the greatest moments. And not because it was a swimming race. Cause it sounds really dumb,
[59:28] but. Because that was one of the only times that I've ever experienced surprising myself,
[59:35] like, doing more than I ever imagined I could do.
[59:40] You know,
[59:41] looking at the clock and thinking that can't be right,
[59:45] and turning around and seeing everybody in the stands going crazy because I'm a body length ahead of all the other swimmers that were in my heat in a 50, you know, and I'm.
[59:55] And I'm turning back up to the clock and just, like, just starting to cry. Just like what?
[01:00:02] Just. I mean, it's funny, but I think of that. I use that example with my kids. Like, you.
[01:00:08] You are more than what you think you are.
[01:00:10] You can surprise yourself.
[01:00:12] Don't think. Don't think there are going to be things that won't happen that kind of take you to that next.
[01:00:18] That next level where you.
[01:00:21] You do more than you thought you could. I guess so.
[01:00:26] Tara: It's. Beautiful story.
[01:00:27] Christina Donovan: Yeah, beautiful. Wow.
[01:00:29] Tara: I almost feel like that's a great place to end.
[01:00:35] Shannon George: Well, it was great talking with you guys, and I'm so glad you.
[01:00:39] You didn't have to encourage me too much, but I just need. I was just needing to get into the right headspace, so thinking through the questions helped with that.
[01:00:47] Christina Donovan: Oh, I don't know. I just. I really. This was tremendous. Thank you, Shannon.
[01:00:53] Shannon George: Aw, thanks, Tina.
[01:00:55] Tara: Yeah, I still feel like there's so many other things we could have talk about.
[01:01:00] Christina Donovan: Yeah, we only kind of scratched the surface on some things, but, yeah, it was all interesting.
[01:01:06] Shannon George: So.
[01:01:06] Tara: Good.
[01:01:07] Shannon George: Thanks.
[01:01:09] Tara: After the recording, there were a couple of corrections that Shannon wanted me to get in.
[01:01:17] She was not the homecoming queen. She was just part of the homecoming court,
[01:01:23] and she wanted to be sure that was clear.
[01:01:26] And the other correction was in the story of meeting her husband, Chris.
[01:01:32] She went to the symphony with her LDI friends, the Leadership Development Initiative friends,
[01:01:39] and not her Teach for America friends.
[01:01:42] So I apologize for those mistakes and wanted to set the record straight. Here's your connection challenge for today,
[01:01:51] inspired by Shannon's story and her reminder that friendships often grow out of shared experiences.
[01:01:59] We want you to do something together.
[01:02:03] Think of something you've been wanting to do.
[01:02:06] Maybe it's joining a class,
[01:02:08] taking a walk, going to a concert,
[01:02:11] volunteering,
[01:02:12] or just trying something new and invite one or more people to join you.
[01:02:18] It doesn't have to be big or perfectly planned. The goal is simply to connect through doing.
[01:02:24] Because as Shannon reminded us,
[01:02:27] sometimes friendship starts with saying yes to the invitation, to the moment, and to each other.
[01:02:34] And when you do it, we'd love to hear how it goes.
[01:02:37] Thank you for those who shared from last week's Connection Challenge.
[01:02:41] We'd love to hear your story and you can share it@messymiddlesence.com we so appreciate you being here and listening to Messy Middlescence.
[01:02:53] We'd love to hear from you your feedback,
[01:02:56] ideas,
[01:02:57] or even topics you'd like us to explore.
[01:03:00] You can reach us at our website,
[01:03:03] www.messymiddlescence.com.
[01:03:07] and don't forget to subscribe or leave a review to help us grow this wonderful community.
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Learn more about Teach for America – teachforamerica.org
Explore Impact 100 and collective giving networks –
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Shannon (Douglass) George grew up in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, and graduated from the University of Mount Union in 1992 with a degree in Elementary Education and minors in Specific Learning Disabilities and Psychology.
At the encouragement of a high school friend, she joined Teach for America in Helena, Arkansas — an experience that confirmed her love of helping people but also clarified that classroom teaching wasn’t her calling. From there, Shannon moved to Atlanta, where a series of temporary jobs led her into the world of fundraising consulting.
After several years, she returned home to Pittsburgh to be closer to family and explore more meaningful work. She held roles at Duquesne University’s Nonprofit Leadership Institute and at Family Communications, where she briefly worked on a Fred Rogers initiative called Get the GIST (Girls in Science and Technology). Eventually, she transitioned out of the nonprofit world and became operations manager at Daedalus Excel, Inc., a product development firm — a position she loved for its people-centered and creative nature.
For the past 19 years, Shannon has devoted herself to raising her three children — Duncan (22), Lincoln (19), and Violet (15) — alongside her husband, Chris. She lives just south of Pittsburgh, where she finds joy in singing with her church and community choirs, taking long walks, playing pickleball (when she’s not rehabbing her shoulder), going to the theatre, and soaking up time with family before the kids all “fly the coop.”
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Inspired by Shannon’s story — and her reminder that friendship often grows out of shared experiences — here’s your challenge for today:
Do something together.
Choose something you’ve been wanting to do — a class, a walk, a concert, volunteering — and invite one or more people to join you.
It doesn’t have to be big or perfectly planned. The goal is simply to connect through doing.When you do, please share your story with us at messymiddlescence.com. We’d love to hear how it goes.